How Do We Establish Priorities – And – Why Doesn’t Everyone Agree with Me?

I was recently at a government office attempting to pay the fee for a pavilion rented (by phone) for son 1.0’s “end of school” party.  Given that all the arrangements were handled previously (by phone) and all that remained was issuing payment and signing the forms, one would think this was a five minute process.  One would be wrong.

The civil servant handling the transaction was extraordinarily pleasant; but, during the course of our meeting, she took (I SWEAR), 9 telephone calls from other citizens seeking to reserve pavilions in city parks.    It occurred to me that there was a decision making process at play I didn’t fully understand.  It seemed to me that one’s priority should rest with the customer standing in your presence, cash in hand, not the knuckleheads on the telephone.  I confess, along about the fifth call, I was beginning to head in the general direction of aggravation when it occurred to me, three days earlier, I was the knucklehead on the phone interrupting some other paying customer.  Hmm.  Then I had an epiphany, we (the rest of the world and I) need to establish a system of priorities that somehow involves me being at the top of the list.  Problem solved!  In my joy at having reached an eminently reasonable and workable solution, I shared this information with wife 2.0 and son 1.0 and it turns out they reached precisely the same conclusion. Unfortunately, there are now at least three people in the universe (me, W2.0 and S1.0) who must at all times be at the absolute apex of anyone’s priority list.  The natural collision of these competing positions revealed itself when I instructed 1.0 to take out the garbage.  He engaged in the same sort of mental gymnastics I experienced in the government office building and determined that his priorities involved further destruction of aliens on some grievously overpriced video game.  Unfortunately, his priority collided with my clearly established priority of having the remnants of last night’s fish supper taken to the curb, while at the same time colliding with 2.0’s established priority concerning who was to do the dishes.  Hmm.

It turns out that what I thought was a clearly established protocol in which everyone would simply move my wants, needs and desires to the top of their priority list, might not be a workable solution after all.  Who woulda figured? Well, actually 2.0 woulda figured given that she is wife 2.0, not wife 1.0 and that perhaps at some point in my life, my wants, needs and desires ran head long into the wants needs and desires of someone else.  I suppose all I can say in response is that when it comes to this relationship, I am husband 2.0.  Who woulda figured?

See you next time.